In a computer room, swap 2 computer's monitor cables. When people use the computers they will be watching each others screen.
Try echoing some strange things into a newbie's autoexec.bat. "This computer has been infected with the newbie virus," or "I'm too tired to work today."
In Word 97, holding the ALT key down allows you to move or delete the buttons, even the menus. Move all of the menus so they're out of order, or, for mor e fun, move all the menus into the Window menu. Watch your co-worker go crazy! (Tip: you may want to save a backup copy of the NORMAL.DOT file found in C:\Program Files\Microsoft Office\Templates. Then they can at least undo the damage without having to r e-install)
Place scotch tape over a user's mouseball.
On a Macintosh, make a new folder. Place it on the desktop, and change the icon to look exactly like the folder in which everything on the computer resides. This folder is usually located on the top right hand corner of the desktop right after booting . Then change the icon of the original folder to be blank, so that there is no icon. This is best done by copying and pasting a little dot drawn in any application like Aldus or Clarisworks. Now change the title of the mimick folder to the name of the har d drive folder's name. Then change the name of the original folder to " ". (Click on the original folder, hitting the return key, let the title highlight, and hit the space bar.) Then move the original folder, which is now changed, to the lower l eft corner. Then move the mimick folder where the original folder previously was.
Unplug the mice and keyboard just enough to make them inoperable. Most users will reboot hoping to solve the problem. Time them for fun!
Have fun with Microsoft Word's AutoCorrect feature. Try replacing their name with "is a dork" every time.
Using ResEdit, make open "icn18" in the System folder. Take an icon, like the Trash for example (res# -3993) and copy and paste it to the "New Folder" (res# 3999). All the folders will show up as Trash! As will all New Folders created from the File Me nu!
On an Amiga try swapping the mouse into port 2. Easy!
Take ONE key off the keyboard and take the spring out. A good one is "E" -- see if he or she can write that thesis without it...
One of the dumbest keys on the keyboard but one of the best for a great laugh is NumLock. Newbies always wonder why "8" always moves the cursor up, and "3" does a PgDn!
Put a "Clapper", a sound activated on/off switch, in line with either the CPU or the monitor. Then make any sharp sound to turn the power off. When the user starts banging around, things will mysteriously begin to work again. It is possible to play sounds remotely on some workstations (Sun SparcStations for instance).
You can have all kinds of fun playing sounds like flushing toilets and other unual sounds.
Run a graphic slide show on the overhead computer projectors found in many computer rooms and large lecture halls. Very effective if done before a large class. You may wish to superglue the drive doors shut as well as all the relevant power switches i n the "on" position and the power cables to the wall and hide the keyboard.
Write a small program that prints "Formatting C:" and starts printing a series of dots at interevals afterwards. Simulate disk access by continuously creating and deleting an empty text files.
Write a daemon that sends each individual page of a print job to a different printer on the network. Select the printer at random.
Rig the spring in a Macintosh floppy drive to fire the disk a goodly distance from the machine upon ejection.
Flip the write protection switch to the on position and give it to the newbie. It will keep him occupied for a while!
Try to find a users host and terminal-device (finger user / who -all / ...) and then login (or telnet / remsh / ...) to this machine. Type echo $YOUR_MESSAGE >> /dev/users_terminal. Use this to get rid of users if you need to login ($YOUR_MES SAGE = "Message from root: System shuts down in 5 minutes.).
Add this to the victim's .login or .profile: echo sleep 3 >> .login or .profile as appropriate. Whenever they log in it adds a command to do nothing for three seconds on to the end of the person's login file. Every time the victim logs in it takes 3 seconds longer to do so.
Disconnect the target's mouse, and plug in a very long serial cable from the back of the target's computer. Connect the other end of the cable into another mouse in the room. Make sure that you're in the room when he tries to use his mouse, and you' re actually controlling it.
If your target uses a lot of batch files, edit the three or four most popular ones and add the following lines to the beginning of the batch file: @echo off echo xxx is a dork > dork.txt (where xxx is the target's name) The target will eventually find one of the many dork.txt files and delete it. Even if the target deletes ALL the dork.txt files, they of course keep coming back.
Change the Prompt to 'Bad Command or File Name', or 'Fatal Disk Error'
Record your "friend" saying something stupid then put that as their Windows startup.
On a newbie's computer, Create a .txt file with something creative such as 'A message from (newbie's computer company): We sold you a defective computer. Please come to our store with your receipt to exchange it.' In Windows95, save it in C:\WINDOWS\START MENU\PROGRAMS\STARTUP. In Windows 3.1, save it in their StartUp group. When the victim turns on the computer, this important text document will appear.
Put a password on the screen saver and write something creative on the srolling marquee.
Make a batch file with the same name as a program the user runs often and have it do anything you want.
Press the "PrintScrn" key and paste it to a paint program like Paintbrush. Save it as a .bmp file and use it as their wallpaper!
On Unix if you're on the local network use the "write" command to talk to some user. They'll get a message saying your username etc. Then before they can reply type " On the Macintosh, use resedit and change the alert window so when you empty your trash it asks tells you that your hard disk is corrupted and the buttons will say Purge Data and Erase Hard Disk. Though the buttons will still do the same thing .
If you are in a computer lab, quit to DOS, type echo off then cls and watch the newbies cry.
Tack a simple recursive program to the end of the config.sys so the Win95 bootup screen never ends.
In Windows, go to the Control Panel and make the mouse double clicking speed the fastest it can be. It is almost impossible to double click that fast.
Make a batch file called DIR.BAT in the root directory and make the contents of that file @ECHO OFF on the first line and CTTY NUL on the second. This will freeze the PC when the user types DIR. They must reboot.
Once you have control of the computer, open Control Panel and change everything to black. Exit and close up Program Manager so the majority cannot be seen. This works fine as nobody can find the icons they need.
Carefully pry the top two corners of a 3.5" diskette apart and take out the tape. Then remove the tape from the round metal thing in the middle, and you have yourself a fake disk. Use creatively!
Obtain your roommates girlfriend's e-mail address. Proceed to write her love letters from a mysterious someone (don't use your own address to write her). This will create havoc.
Change the target's keyboard setting to a different layout. Be sure to have your Windows install disks handy.
For Windows 3.x users, you can set up a really pathetic screen saver, and then, through dos, rename their progman.exe file so that they cannot access it to change it. It also helps to hide and restrict the program manager file with the attributes so they can't get it back.
In Windows set the file properties for an application to open another application. Can't you just see the computer newbies trying to explain that one to their company helpdesk. They will be branded as idiots and freaks.
Switch the "M" and "N" keys on the keyboard. This is rarely noticed for some time, and works best when a person has a password with the letters "M" or "N".
Rewire all the monitors to different computers, do the same with the keyboards. When they come to turn them on they will not be what the hell is going on.
If a computer has Windows with some intro sound, turn up the volume to the max at the back of the computer.
Take the ball from the mouse. Tell them a mouse took it into the wall. :)
On a networked computer lab with one or two printers, run in there when it's really busy and hit Print Screen a helluva lot of times on one computer. Better yet, tape it down or jam the connection tube (you'll know what I mean if you rip the key cover off).
Put a cheese slice in the disk drive.
Rearrange the keys so they are in alphabetical order. Next time the newbie comes to the keyboard, they'll wonder why the 'A' prints out a 'Q'.
Turn the brightness down on all the moniters in the room. Everybody'll be bending over, glaring at the dimmed moniters.
Tell the newbie that the 'ANY' key is the big power button.
Disconnect a newbie's keyboard or moniter. It's amazing how long they stay stumped.
Open the mouse and tape the ball to the insides of the contraption.
Put silver nitrate or other soluble metallic salts on the keys to leave black stains on everyone's fingers. See who has been using YOUR computer. :) Make sure beforehand that the salt you choose does come off over time. Silver nitrate has been tested and works fine.
Rig the computer so that every time someone presses Enter the computer reboots.
Secretly change a buddy's .signature file for his e-mail. Replace his info with porn star credits, or call girl services. Be creative!
In Mouse, in Control Panel in Windows 3.1 or 95, switch the settings for mouse buttons from left hand users to right handed user's or the other way around. Works with the computer experts!
Here's one if your victim lives with their parents. Download a nude picture and save it to a disk. Then get on your victim's computer and place that image file in their startup group so the next time they turn it on it will put up the image.
In DOS autoexec.bat, 1st line: @autoexec.bat The system appears to "lock" up as it is in a continous loop (executing autoexec.bat). Ctrl-C breaks the loop. This was an exercise at Compaq several years ago for the repair cert's. They put it o n the tightest (most compact) laptop and had the perspective techs "fix" the problem. One tech took the whole thing apart and replaced every card before someone told them what was up.
Change the newbie's prompt around...
C:\>prompt $p$g - C:>\
C:\>prompt $p - C:\
C:\>prompt $g - C:>
C:\>prompt $ - (nothing)
Use resedit or another editor and change the text in the windows from 'save in ten minutes' or whatever to 'system error type-91' or 'you must restart machine'.
For Macintoshes with System 7.5, make an alias of the Shut Down DA in the Apple Menu Items folder (which is in the System Folder) and put it in the Startup Items folder (also in the System Folder). Every time they startup the Mac, it will automaticall y shut off! To fix this, hold down Shift at startup and drag the alias you created out of the Startup Items folder.
Fake Email can easily be sent by telnetting into the mail server of your choice, port 25. Then, type:
helo
mail from:_____(victim e-mail)_____
rcpt to:_____(sender e-mail)_____
data
(your message)
.
quit
Put a few cute aliases in a newbie's .profile or .login. Try: alias ls echo 'ls: command not found.' or alias vi rm
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