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Dear Daniel, lost brother: You wrote quite a piece, and I pray you take the time to read what I have written back to you here: You forget that people are infallible. I too struggle with being critical. The Kingdom, though imperfect, is striving to be perfect and the Kingdom needs for people to stay faithful and stand strong on their convictions to help change where things are not righteous. Kip McKean addressed this late last year - where he said he wants every disciple to feel like he can go to any leader with issues. The bottom line is that we help be part of the solution. God needs people like you to stay faithful - to be the squeaky wheel - to be zealous and stand strong for righteousness. And also do so with respect and humility for others' opinions, convictions and ideas. In the AMS I have been a disciple for three years and I have seen a lot of things that have made me think 'is this the Kingdom?' and 'this is not what God intended!'. But God is faithful. The truth is always uncovered and laid bare before us - as long as we are all trying to grow together. The Kingdom is not going to run perfectly. Only Christ (and God of course) is perfect and we all must set our eyes on him and then we all will be growing in our wisdom and faith as we learn from our mistakes - and as we learn to grow when we fall 'victim' to others mistakes. 1. Mandatory Minimums. Before you read the rest of this - please note that in my sector there are no 'minimums' except in the teens it's $1.00. And we just have the teens check their hearts if they don't bring it. If they really could not have brought it, Amen. Daniel, you are right. God asks for 10% - not $10.00. Perhaps the leaders out there are not seeing that people are compromising righteousness to meet a human standard. However, for ministries to make it in today's world, there needs to be a set amount of $ they can count on to keep it going. Also, I lead in the teens in the AMS, and I know that if a teen can get a job working one or two days a week to have money to be responsible for things - than a college student can righteously come up with $10.00 - if that is the need of the ministry. And in those cases where $10.00 is really too much, then that situation should be addressed. I would not think that the person should be labeled a 'sinner' for not paying $10.00 if he does not have it - but I would address the heart behind someone who does not want to do their best to help the ministry meet the needs of everyone. Ten dollars is not that much money. May I also say that I am a college grad (in 3 1/2 years) who was not a disciple then - lived off of 300$ month (included rent, food and books), worked workstudy (20 hrs a week) that went directly into my tuition - and managed to pay for all the little do-dads to go with being a college cheerleader. I also had the most expensive books to buy, being a Bio Chem major. I averaged 2 hours of sleep each night. Somehow I made it (and I partied A LOT back then). As a college student, you may have to rely on the Spirit more. However, if anyone makes you feel inferior or unspiritual because you do the best you can to do your part (to come up with the goal made to met the needs of the Kingdom - ie. the Big Picture), then that person needs to chill. If you feel like your heart is right, and you feel confident before God - then Amen, don't worry about pleasing people. But listen and take what they say into your heart with humility. If you then feel your heart is right - then don't let Satan get into your head to make you think they are putting unreasonable pressure on you. Raising money at special is not a test of where you are at spiritually - or a test if you can do the impossible (although the heart can easily be revealed here)- it is a time where we all rally in unison to sacrifice to make $ to help build up the Kingdom - to help meet needs. Biblically, it says to give 10%. Biblically it says that the members of the body sold everything they had and gave to anyone who is in need. Perhaps the tact at which you were asked to contribute these monies was not with loads of wisdom - or perhaps the person relaying the message misunderstood the instruction given to him - however, you have your Bible and you were a part of a church were Christ, love, humility and change is taught above all else. For the welfare of the Kingdom - and to help more people learn the truth about the cross - try your best to understand where they are coming from - why the amount is needed - and explain your need or concern, in a peaceful, humble manner. This is what Jesus would have done. Also, maybe you feel backed against the wall in your contributions, and yet with prayer and a little creativity, you may be able to come up with the amount needed. It is a matter of heart and perspective. Perhaps you should talk to someone who went to Manila and saw Smokey Mountain... perhaps you should know that the leaders there do not even have running water... perhaps you should know that over 6000 really do worship God now in Russia...thanks to the sacrifice of thousands of disciples. Perhaps you should ask some of the older disciples what kinds of sacrifices had to be made so that the L.A.C.C. could exist. Maybe this would inspire your heart as to the point of special contribution... 2. Excommunication I do not know the circumstance but based on what you said, Shelly Metten could be over-reacting. If 'Mary' really wants to go to Women's Day, have her call Shelly directly and share her heart. Perhaps there are some issues about 'Mary' that you do not know about. No one I know of would do this unless (as it is AWESOME to see fallaways walk back in the door!) there was strong evidence that the person is devisive. And keeping that person from being the 'wolf in the sheeps' pin' or from being the 'yeast that will work through the whole batch of dough' IS Biblical. However, anyone can change. Shelly's goal is to keep her 'sheep' safe. But you are right, 'Mary', could be changed and ready to live God's way, and it will (notice I say 'will' as God is in control) be allowed to her if that is what she trully desires. Remember, Shelly is allowed grace too. She may not be right. But she is doing her best to be godly - and to protect her sheep. But then again, in your humility... Shelly could be right. I have been sincerely wrong many times, have you? 3. Psychological Damage Please do not insult me by lumping me in with your personal generality here. I have many friends that are fallaways. And I am their friends today - true and sure. Usually fallaways do not want to stay friends because they feel guilty. Or sometimes it is hard for disciples to stay good friends because #1 - disciples have lots of people in their lives (so the fallaway should try not to take it personal - in the world you do not tend to have a 10th the # of friends as you do as a disciple) and #2 - the fallaways are into sinful living. My friend Kim fell away. I love her so much. Even today we laugh together like few do. But she likes to go to bars and pick up men. That is not for me. Some fallaways are 'marked' because they are trying to drag other disciples out too - either directly trying to get them to fall away, or by trying to damage their faith - or sometimes by planting doubt and giving Satan something to work with in the minds of the believers. You are probably marked because you are trying to plant doubt into others' minds by your email. I am writing to you to help me as well as plead with you to reconsider. Use your knowledge - your insight into these matters - to make things BETTER. I think you are unfortunately receiving the reactions of some disciples who are hurt by your leaving. You have been a disciple a long time. It kills my faith when a friend I have known and fought the spiritual battle side by side with leaves. It hurts me to spend time with them, and it is easier on me emotionally to move on. That is NOT RIGHT - but it is human nature. I challenge you to call someone who you feel you can communicate your heart with - whether it be Kip - or Bruce - or someone else completely. The Kingdom needs people to fix these things. There are a lot of people that would rather just do what they're told instead of arguing the righteousness of it. They are afraid of confronting people. David Graham has done INCREDIBLE things with the AMS - around the world. And the first 3 years he was a disciple, he was 'difficult'. He saw things that were not right and spoke up about it. Kip started the church that way years ago. Stand up for how you feel and keep fighting for God's righteousness. Just remember that as the church is filled with imperfect people who make mistakes, so are you an imperfect person who can make mistakes. It all comes back to humility and courage. Amen? Sincerely, A sister who cares, Lara You can email Lara Cottrell and tell her what you think. Contact: Daniel de Sailles
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